“There is no wealth but life”, said John Ruskin.
“So true”, says I.
A couple of days ago, a woman I knew had killed herself by hanging. Sad-it is. But I could not sympathize with her.
Wondering why? I’ll explain.
She left behind two little children (a boy and a girl) who are not aware that their mother has passed away. Kids of age 7 and 4 are too young to realise the effects of a death on people. The little girl is still looking for her mother’s saree pallu to hold on to while she falls asleep. It was a heart-breaking scene to see the sleepy-baby struggling to get out of her aunt’s hold to reach her dead mother’s side. The older boy doesn’t want to look at his mother’s corpse as it did not look like his mother.
How could a mother not think of the lives of her little ones and take such a cowardly decision?
It has come to the open that her life was not a bed of roses, but whose is??? Problems are a major part of anyone’s life, more so for a married woman. I always thought (with no intension to insult/hurt my male friends) that women have more emotional stamina and than men. Although, such suicides make me think again.
For ages women have undergone and survived serious emotional athyachaar from issues like dowry,
abusive husbands and mother-in-laws, etc. But, black-or-blue, they managed to live through it at least for the sake of their children. Even though this girl did fight through certain similar issues, she managed to pull-it-off for almost a decade.
A single moment’s impulse and the loss of common sense resulted with the end of four people’s lives. She is now is peace, but she did manage to take with her - everyone else’s. Unfortunately, no clear reason for the move has been left behind. This has allowed the society to arrive at conclusions which, I am sure, are far more grotesque than she could have had in mind.
‘Angry husband hits and hangs her’
‘Guilty of her fights and actions towards her missing MIL, she hangs’
‘Decides to escape drunken husband’s athyachaar forever’
...so on and so forth.
It would be highly idiotic of me if I said, ‘as a woman, just go through all your troubles silently’. I know that I cannot and I ever-so-certainly will not. But, it is for sure that there is always a better way than suicide. Had she stopped for one second and thought of the reaction her actions would have on her kids, they would still have a mother. A mother is a very important asset to one’s life and those kids have lost it even before they could have a proper taste of it. :(
Whatever said and done, the ones that are at a greater loss are her kids and I cannot bring myself to forgive her for her actions. She was a very strong person and her end at her own hands is such a blow that would take us quite some time to get over.
Till then, with prayers for the well-being of the kids and hopes that no one else I know takes such a futile decision.
“So true”, says I.
A couple of days ago, a woman I knew had killed herself by hanging. Sad-it is. But I could not sympathize with her.
Wondering why? I’ll explain.
She left behind two little children (a boy and a girl) who are not aware that their mother has passed away. Kids of age 7 and 4 are too young to realise the effects of a death on people. The little girl is still looking for her mother’s saree pallu to hold on to while she falls asleep. It was a heart-breaking scene to see the sleepy-baby struggling to get out of her aunt’s hold to reach her dead mother’s side. The older boy doesn’t want to look at his mother’s corpse as it did not look like his mother.
How could a mother not think of the lives of her little ones and take such a cowardly decision?
It has come to the open that her life was not a bed of roses, but whose is??? Problems are a major part of anyone’s life, more so for a married woman. I always thought (with no intension to insult/hurt my male friends) that women have more emotional stamina and than men. Although, such suicides make me think again.
For ages women have undergone and survived serious emotional athyachaar from issues like dowry,
abusive husbands and mother-in-laws, etc. But, black-or-blue, they managed to live through it at least for the sake of their children. Even though this girl did fight through certain similar issues, she managed to pull-it-off for almost a decade.
A single moment’s impulse and the loss of common sense resulted with the end of four people’s lives. She is now is peace, but she did manage to take with her - everyone else’s. Unfortunately, no clear reason for the move has been left behind. This has allowed the society to arrive at conclusions which, I am sure, are far more grotesque than she could have had in mind.
‘Angry husband hits and hangs her’
‘Guilty of her fights and actions towards her missing MIL, she hangs’
‘Decides to escape drunken husband’s athyachaar forever’
...so on and so forth.
It would be highly idiotic of me if I said, ‘as a woman, just go through all your troubles silently’. I know that I cannot and I ever-so-certainly will not. But, it is for sure that there is always a better way than suicide. Had she stopped for one second and thought of the reaction her actions would have on her kids, they would still have a mother. A mother is a very important asset to one’s life and those kids have lost it even before they could have a proper taste of it. :(
Whatever said and done, the ones that are at a greater loss are her kids and I cannot bring myself to forgive her for her actions. She was a very strong person and her end at her own hands is such a blow that would take us quite some time to get over.
Till then, with prayers for the well-being of the kids and hopes that no one else I know takes such a futile decision.
